MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO SOMEONE
This book was a wonderful surprise because I am seriously hypercritical of memoirs. I often find them boring or melodramatic or both. And I get very distracted by authors’ decisions to write a memoir in the first place.
All of this to say, I absolutely LOVED Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, Lori Gottlieb’s warm and wise exploration of psychotherapy told from both sides of the couch. In it, she describes her own path to becoming a therapist, and illustrates the therapy process through the stories of a few of her most interesting patients. And she talks about seeking her own therapy, after a hiccup in her life plan caused by a bad break up.
The book is a perfect balance of interesting and entertaining, and Gottlieb presents the stories with insight, humor, and charm. One key takeaway, for me, was the idea that there are no rules when it comes to needing emotional support. It’s easy to feel like there is a scale for what causes sadness or pain, from life’s minor annoyances to a terminal illness or loss of a loved one. But I love the idea, subtly posited here, that there doesn’t need to be a tiered system for difficult feelings, and that everyone can use support and guidance for how to deal with them. I rooted for Gottlieb and her patients throughout, and wanted to hear more when it was over. It’s also a super audiobook (as long as you’re fine with crying in your car a little bit). :
One of the more complex patients, a brash TV writer and producer, uses his cellphone and orders in lunch during his therapy sessions. How obnoxious! Over time, though, bonding over Chinese chicken salads becomes a ritual for therapist and patient, and provide a path to progress. At first I thought I needed a recipe for this post, but then realized, I can make my own, self-actualized salad! Crunchy noodles or sesame seeds? Chicken shredded or grilled? Mandarin oranges - yuck or yes? Much like therapy, there’s no right answer, and one size does not fit all. Just explore, grow, and enjoy.
